


This Is Normal Now

by noctiscorvus



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-03
Updated: 2015-11-03
Packaged: 2018-04-29 18:36:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5138345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noctiscorvus/pseuds/noctiscorvus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John could have gone surfing instead of this. John deserves to go surfing after this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	This Is Normal Now

**Author's Note:**

  * For [yarnandtea](https://archiveofourown.org/users/yarnandtea/gifts).



> For some reason, Dragon Age and Stargate just makes sense. So, using Yarnandtea's 'Eluvian mirrors are totally Quantum mirrors' theory, I give you Alistair and the one where he tags along with Sheppard's team because that's such a good idea.
> 
> Gifted to the instigator because I honestly haven't written in damn near ages plus this crossover needs more love.  
> I've also given up on getting the format to look normal.

John has had a long day, a long day that had followed an even longer week full of new recruits, paperwork, a couple kidnap attempts by the Genii, a debriefing on how a few Marines and one scientist scorched half the west pier, more paperwork and a few trade negotiations that Teyla could have pulled off better than John. In her sleep.  
He was at that stage where weariness had settled in his bones, too many hours of sitting still in conflict with his usual active routine.  
So, of course he’d jumped at the chance for an away mission, the cobwebs and stiff joints shaking loose as he stepped off-world.

That was barely 5 hours age and regret has pretty much replaced the weariness by now, as the sounds of bickering echo from wall to wall.  
While he’s used to Rodney, his mouth running a mile a minute being the norm, Alistair seems to know how to bring the scientist to a whole new level.  
"There isn't some 'magic-mind-switchy-thing' we just have to think off! There's no science behind this, just gross planty things that's only weakness beyond C-4 is Ronon's fortitude for breaking stuff!" John can picture Rodney’s hands flying around, airquotes and gestures of unknown origin and meaning supplementing his argument.

To his three o'clock, barely visible in the dimness, Alistair shuffles in vain, seemingly always plagued with an itch whenever he’s bound.  
The Warden lets out a sigh of defeat before returning his focus back on Rodney, his drawl calm-as-you-please and friendly enough you'd almost believe the words were well meant,"Well, I hardly doubt we’ve been out cold long enough for this stuff to have grown naturally, so obviously there’s some contraption we could make use of. I mean, I’m absolutely fine with Ronon breaking us out but I think our odds would be somewhat better if he was, well, **awake**.” The last word deadpanned in what seemed to be a habit of Alistair's when he's making a point.  
Before Rodney can even respond though, he carries on in a much too pleasant tone, “And if I recall, Dr Parrish is a scientist. You know, a practitioner of.. _Science_.”

John decides regret isn’t a big enough word. 

He spends the next few minutes listening to Rodney splutter about how Parrish couldn’t even find his way through Altantis’ central district without help, let alone find the definition of the word scientist in a dictionary.  
At which point Alistair snorts and points out the botanist would likely sooner rant about the waste and destruction of the perfectly good tree of which the book was made.  
Then, before bridges can be mended, follows up with how Rodney himself getting lost in the forest is the exact reason why they’re all strung up in a Wraith ship for dinner. As in the actual meal, not as dinner guests, Rodney, the latter namely meaning they could leave if they wanted. Which they can't.

“Can I just say,” Alistair starts, ignoring Rodney’s threats of cold showers for a month, "Atleast the Darkspawn had enough manners to wait till you were dead before eating you."  
John mulls that over for a couple seconds, eyes squinting in thought “Would it be manners though?”  
”Etiquette, an es oh pe?”  
”Not really sure indiscriminate killing counts as an SOP.”  
They fall into silence after that, one to his own thoughts while the other reattempts to relieve the itch on his nose, till Rodney's indignant huffs at being ignored gets interrupted by Ronon's gruff voice bringing up an old argument as he starts working on getting himself loose. "I could kill a dragon."


End file.
